Tuesday, April 08, 2008

Fart and Poop...or I am a 5 year old boy

On the way home tonight, we passed through a very bad smell. I was teasing the Monster, asking if he tooted. He said NO, so I blamed dragon (His imaginary friend). He tells me that Monster FARTS every where...the bedroom, the dining room, the kitchen, outside, in the car...he poops and farts everywhere. Thank goodness he's invisible.
**********
One morning last week, driving to daycare/school/work, Monster is in the back seat just chattering away with the daily 50 questions (mama, what's that bus number, mama, is that the same as the number of seats, mama, where is that bus going, mama, who's driving that van...I get so tired of hearing mama every once in awhile) when I heard the distinctive sound of gas passing loudly from his area. As he was taking a breath, he said "sorry, excuse me, I farted." Of course, I had to chuckle a little quietly. He then proceeds to tell how "that was a big fart...really big...wow. It went up in the air and exploded everywhere....it was like a bomb." PB and I were practically gasping for air from laughing so hard. All I could think was that is father would be so proud.
**********
Sitting on the toilet a few weeks ago, he calls me in. I come in, "yes monster?"
"Mama, I have good news!"
My mind races..."yes baby?"
"My dragon had babies. There are 10 and then 10 more. That makes 20! Now I have 123 dragons!"
"That's great babe, are they living with us, too?"
"Of course, where else would they live?"
***********
Speaking of dragon, he has really become a bad influence. After hollering for monster a couple of times with no response, I sent one of his sisters to get him. (Of course, they had to holler first. Cause my hollering wasn't loud enough.) He finally gets to me, and his excuse for not coming? When he watches TV, dragon takes over his brain and he can't listen anymore. He's sorry, but it isn't his fault...it's that naughty dragons!
************

2 comments:

jessica @pianomomsicle said...

When my nephew was maybe 3? i can't remember exactly how old, he totally farted pretty loudly. And then he said this gem:
"Oh, excuse me. I burped, but out of my butt, not out of my mouf."

Precious the things they say! Especially when they are in public, right? :)

Anonymous said...

Oh my...that is a naughty (smelly) dragon. What a sweetheart your son is! It makes me feel a little better about how fast Big Red is growing up.