November? Already?

I'm full of cliche's today.  I can't believe it's November.  It seems like it was just the first day of school, and the first marking period is already over.  We are as busy as ever with the kids and their activities, and I went and signed up to do a craft show.  Silly me.

In other news, here they are in all of their Halloween glory.

Bug as a witch to hand out candy.

PB...I'm not sure what she was?  It started out wanting a mask,
 then saw the wins and tutu, then the pantyhose.  She's cute though.

The super stealthy ninja boy known as Monster.
 Yes, we had him wear his martial arts uniform.  I'm cheap, okay?

And off on another tangent, I signed up for NaBloPoMo...let's see how long I last.

A Doctor's Visit- growing up version

So I took the kids to the doctor's earlier this week for their annual well-visits, with a side of shots.  I really can't remember if I posted about this before, but taking my kids for shots is akin to wrestling an octopus while someone tries to tranquilize it.  To say that they hate getting shots would be an understatement. 

Several years ago, PB had to get shots unexpectedly.  While we waited for the nurse to come back in, she chanted "I'll do it tomorrow" over and over working herself into a frenzy.  By the time the nurse came in (10 minutes later), we had to have another nurse come help hold her down so that the first nurse could give her a the shot.  She screamed and cried and thrashed about.  It was hell, and I was crying by the end of it.  The Monster's next visit wasn't as bad, but was still hard.

So the next year, I didn't tell them they were getting shots.  They didn't ask, and I didn't tell (I am a military wife you know ).  When the nurse brought the shots in, my sons look could have killed me.  It was still hard, but at least it was only hard for a minute or so.

This year, I was upfront. I told them earlier in the week that they had doctor's appts, and that they would be getting shots.  My mom offered to go with us, and I thought that would be great.  Normally, I'm busy trying to help the child currently getting shots and I feel like I'm not "there" for the other one.  But of course, this time, both of them took them like champs.  Figures.  The nurses have gotten smart, and they give the kids those frozen Popsicle tubes.  They have them hold them where they are going to give the shot for a few minutes, and once the shots are done they can eat them.  That helped A LOT!

I had quite a few chuckles in that room though.  My son has a toe that makes a popping noise.  It is one of his greatest pleasures in life to sit with his sisters, put his foot on them and make his toe pop.  This elicits great shrieks of "ew gross, get it off me!" from the girls, which of course sends him into great gales of laughter. Being the mama, I was concerned and asked the doctor about it.  She confirmed that it seemed okay, that we all have joints that popped.  She then told him he shouldn't torment his sisters like that, as it was bad for his toe.  He said darn, and she told him he would have to find another way to torment her.  Much giggling ensued.

After it was all over, I had to praise them.  I often tell my kids that sometimes we have to do things we don't like, and they may even hurt, but if it's necessary to stay healthy, we just have to suck it up and deal.  And that is what they did with the shots, and I am so proud of them.

And so happy I don't need the flask to get through an appointment any longer.

The finish line is there...

Turns out I knew what I was talking about when I wrote this post on the first day of school.  This year has been a whirlwind...and I'm still hanging on for dear life.  Bug has her license, although it is still in the graduated stage of having another adult driver in the car with her.  I'm nervous about her driving by herself this summer, but I'm also ready for the break it will give me.  Issy has aced her classes so far...and she's bored in some of them.  Moving her up just isn't an option, so it's off to talk to the principal soon.  Have to find some way to challenge her.  Monster has found the key, and has realized that he can read.  It's funny how excited I am about this.  He is literally reading on his own in the car, reading signs, words on tv.  His teacher asked for a conference last week just to tell us "wow! Whatever you are doing, keep it up!"  I can't stress how big a break through this was for us...and what a load off my stress level it has been.  We went from knowing less than 30 words to reading 92 words in a minute in 8 months. 

Now we're in the "busy season" of the school year.  Concerts, award ceremonies, etc will fill the schedule when there is blank time left from soccer, martial arts, and all those fun events.  But then it will be over, and I will suddenly have a senior!!!!!

Happy 14th of February...

This morning dawned bright and early...before the sun rose. At 5:30 this morning PB was crying hard in the bathroom with sharp pains in her lower abdomen and right lower back. After a quick discussion with a friend that used to be a nurse in our Pediatricians office, off to the ER room we went. I'm a night owl...I stay up way to late, and last night was no different. I was working on 5 or so hours of sleep...the roads still had large chunks of ice and it was freezing cold outside. And while driving there, she started singing along with the radio. A quick check confirmed that her pain threshold had lowered.

We rolled into the ER at 6:05, and were immediately triaged and placed in a room. Hope sprang into my heart. Oh, but it shouldn't have. Shift change occured, and apparently the overnight doctor was waiting for them to come in before seeing any new patients. The overnight nurse asked for a sample, and no one came to test it until the next shift came on. Finally at 8:30, the doctor came in, and he was very nice. Of course, by this time she was no longer in pain. The quick test came back negative for any UTI's. So after an exam, it was determined it was probably a muscle spasm or such,and we were finally sent home. We got home and I immediately left to pick up Bug from her return trip from Florida.

Brunch, gifts, school projects and valentines with Monster. Grocery shopping, dishes, laundry, cooking dinner. It was never ending, and I'm exhausted.

But my hubby did good and bought me a new piece of jewelry. And I did good and scheduled us to go get massages.

I hope you had a great 14th of February...I'm going to go to bed a little earlier tonight.

Counting down and updates...

We aqre a little excited here in casa de mamalang...my husband will be home in the next week.  This long, long year is coming to an end, and we are all ready to move on as a family.  But there are a lot of other things happening here as well!

PB had her teeth pulled last Tuesday, and she came through like a champ.  She has to have a palate expander put in soon, and had to have some of her upper baby teeth removed so that the adult teeth could start coming in.  I feel a bit bad, as chewing is a little difficult, but she's doing great.  They sedated her to make her more comfortable, and the thought of her under anesthesia still makes me want to cry.

I bought this cool plate from Bethany and she added this cool cupcake into the mix.  The kids love that cupcake.  Monster uses it to pretend to hypnotize us...and the colors are Bug's favorites!  Thanks Bethany!

Monster is moving up to a Yellow Belt this weekend...Yay Monster.

PB's birthday party was last weekend. A post will be coming about that soon.

Please, be patient with the light posting...I'm trying to fit everything in while getting to see my hubby :)

And everything falls apart now...

So...hey there internets.  How's the parenting gig working out for you?  Cause I'm sort of sucking at it lately.  Well, really, only one thing, maybe two, but dang it, I'm tired.

I've managed to hold our household together for the last 11 months.  I've fixed (or arranged for someone to fix) broken appliances, lights, etc.  I've stayed on top of my children's schedule, making sure they did their work, got to bed on time, ate mostly good food, had all the permission slips and papers for school, doctor and dental appts made, and so on.  And I've done well so far.  Until school started.

We are in the 4th week of school.  So far, I've forgotten to give one child lunch money one day, manged to get only one of them in bed on time regularly, fed them more non homemade food than in any given 4 month period before, had a child left at horse back lessons, lost both of my military ID's on the same day (they were found the same day) and been late to a million and one things.  But today, today topped it all.

I forgot school picture day for Monster.  Luckily, they still snapped a shot of him, and all is not lost.  Cause retakes?  They are scheduled while we are in Disney. 

And tomorrow, my PB gets five baby teeth removed while under anesthesia.  My SIL is going with us to sit in the room with her, because I'm afraid I'll freak out while she's getting sedated.  Seriously, my stomach has been in knots and I've been on the verge of tears for the last 3 weeks just thinking about it.  I prayed they would fall out, or at least loosen, on their own.  One did fall out (it was originally 6) and several have loosened, but it isn't enough.  I'm stressed and trying to hide it.

But you know what?  I was the only parent in Bug's Chemistry class at open house tonight.  Guess I'm not failing as bad as I thought. 

But thank goodness my husband is home in less than 3 weeks.  The brain is short circuiting from the overload, and I need the help.

It's official, I will be losing my mind this school year

Today was the first day of school for PB and Monster, and tomorrow Bug begins.  What you, dear reader, may not realize right away, is the fact that I will now have a child in all three levels of school.  I have a first grader, sixth grader, and 11th grader.  My supply list runs the gamut from crayons and glue sticks, to binders and dividers, all the way through a drivers permit!

Monster has been so excited about first grade.  Mostly because of his lunch box, which we purchased last year.  This morning, he asked me how long it was until lunch.  When I asked what his favorite part of the day was, his answer was lunch, then recess, then music class.  He definitely has his priorities set.  Tomorrow is Art.  That will blow his mind, I'm sure.  It's amazing to me to see his sense of style evolving as well.

Because my little Monster was so resistant to learning how to read last year, he has been placed in the Literacy First class this year.  I choose to see this as a blessing.  He is smart, and I know that once the right key is turned, reading will become a fun and exciting subject for him.  And this class has the potential to do this for him.  It is a smaller class (only around 16 students) and they focus more attention on reading, writing and such.  However, I am unhappy with how the school year began.  In years past, the day before school you could go and meet your child's teacher during lunch time. This year, state employees (this would be me as well) had our pay cut by 2.5%.  To soften the blow, the Legislator gave us all 5 paid furlough days.  In order to reduce the cost burden, teachers lost in-service days to cover these days.  This means that teachers only had the day before to arrange their rooms and prepare for the first day, unless they wanted to do it on their own time.  That morning was spent in meetings, leaving them only a few hours to set up their rooms.  When we were invited in to find classrooms at 4 pm, most teachers had already gone home.  While I understand why, it's still frustrating.  I don't try to use that time as more than a few minutes of introduction, but a few minutes of understanding what this classroom entails would have been very helpful.  Instead, I will be emailing his teacher tomorrow to ask some questions.  This means she has to find the time to answer me during the school day, instead of having a few minutes the day before.

I'm also upset as I don't feel that he was given the Speech Therapy that he required last year, and this year I will be fighting early for this.  He pronounces his leading L's as Y's, and it's impeding his spelling/reading abilities.

PB began Middle School.  Yesterday we did get our time to travel her schedule and work her locker (a bunch of times.)  She briefly met her teacher, ad her classes are grouped together well.  One of her best friends has all but one class with her, she's getting gym out of the way first semester and it's the last class of the day, and she's excited. Basically, that is pretty much all we can ask.  She asked her sister about her outfit yesterday a bunch of times.  Bug told her that it was a lot of patterns, but she could pull it off.  And I think she did.

Come back tomorrow for an exciting announcement :) (no, I'm not pregnant.)

Season of change

Back to school season always stirs up the winds of change, and this year it seems to be even stronger.  One child moves from half day K to all day 1st grade, another begins Middle School, and the third driver's ed.  Milestones beginning for each of my babies.

This past year has definitely been a year of change as well.  Of course my kids have grown up some, that is inevitable.  But I think that they have also grown stronger.  We were all forced to really look at ourselves, to see our lives through a different filter.  We had to re-evaluate our roles and our relationships.  We could break free of the patterns of the past and move forward without those shackles pulling us back. 

I see so many changes in my girls.  Bug has matured, has realized what so many people have been trying to tell her for so long.  She is a beautiful girl, with so much potential.  There is no need to be defensive, loud, brash, mean.  There is no reason for anger, at yourself or others, any longer. It is time to close that chapter and walk into the bright sunlight.  It is time to live a positive life, embracing the future and allowing the past to remain just that.  I see a child that has turned into a beautiful and smart young lady, with a great future ahead of her.

At one time or another, my husband and I have discussed her future.  We were both concerned with the rude awakening we saw heading her way.  "Someday, someone is going to break through that barrier...I pray that it isn't a catastrophe."  We talked, we shared, we prayed and we loved.  Finally, some of that good has seeped through, and that barrier is safely falling away.

PB has really grown this year as well.  The whines, the temper tantrums, they are still there, but I'm seeing them less often.  I see a witty girl, who is sweet and caring, and it's reflected in the way other children want to be her friend.  People flock to PB, they see her and smile and call her name.

Part of her charm is the way she completely lives in her own world.  She doesn't worry so much about what others think...if she is happy, that's all that matters to her.  She doesn't hear you when you say "that doesn't match," she puts it on and suddenly, it matches.  She is one of the few people I have ever met that can pull off a polka dotted shirt and plaid shorts and make it look cute.  For so many years, she has lived in the shadow of her sister.  She has been the younger sister, always trying to do what Bug did, have what Bug had.  No matter how many times and how many ways we tried to show them that life wasn't a competition between them, it was still there.  But this year, she wasn't so much the little sister every day.  She was the oldest.  She was allowed a little more freedom, and a little more responsibility.  There wasn't someone there to constantly compare herself to, and she blossomed.  Now I see a more mature relationship, a sharing of common interests as well as a protectiveness of each other.  There is still a competitive slant, but it is hushed now, toned down.

I hope this year has also taught my children how blessed our life is.  We may not live in a mansion with maid service and butlers, but we have a good life.  And even without the nice stuff, we have each other.  I'm going to try and remember those blessings every day, and count them, and hold them tight to me.

Adventure travel - road tripping with my kids

When my husband deployed last fall, I promised PB and Monster that we would have a year full of adventures.  So far, we've gone to DC several times, NYC, and now, Chicago.  I think I'm keeping up my end of the bargain.

Thursday, July 25th, we left our house heading to Chicago.  I drove.  Just me and the kids.  We stopped for the night just over the West Virginia/Ohio border, then continued on, stopping in West Lafayette to check out where I went to College, and the Triple X family restaurant. The kids and I saw this restaurant on Diners, Drive-ins and Dives a while back, and I commented that it was located near where I lived while in college.  When I mentioned that I wanted to take the kids through there, PB immediately asked to go to the restaurant.  (I just remembered that we always called it the triple chi.  Cause we were so cool...lol).  Then we finished off our trip north of Chicago late that evening.  Over the course of the week, we visited local attractions near my friends house, Chicago, and Six Flags.  Friday morning, we got up, packed, loaded up the car, and drove home.  We stopped in Michigan to see Bug, and got home in the wee small hours of the morning Saturday morning.  There is a lot more to tell you about all those days, but tonight is a recap, teaser, taste of what is to come.

But right now, I still feel like I'm recuperating from driving all stinking night.  And my bed is calling me.  Sweet dreams.

Middle school, here we come (again)

My baby girl is "graduating" from 5th grade today. It really does just seem like a year or so ago that she started Kindergarten, looking a lot like this...

The beginning of this year, she looked like this...

and now? She looks like this...

I can't believe how much she has grown this year. Physically, she's grown almost a foot. She's slimming down and getting curves and I want to scream and cry at her to stop. But she has developed a great sense of self awareness. She has started to recognize and accept her flaws and quirks, even joining in the laughter when we "pick on her."

Unfortunately, that hasn't stopped the temper tantrums and whining. I swear we have tried everything...I HATE the whining.

But I love her. And I'm proud of her. She has worked hard, and I'm looking forward to the middle school experience with her.

Yet another Washington DC post

I have decided that this year shall forever be known as the year of Washington DC in our family, with New York City a close second.  It is the end of May, and we have already made 4 trips to Washington and tomorrow will mark my second to New York City.  Which is sort of ironic, since I had never been to NYC prior to April of this year. 

Anyway, last Friday I trekked to DC with PB and her class.  Luckily, I was assigned her two best friends, and we had a very good time while we were there.  We were dropped off at the Museum of Art on the Mall, and were given free reign to go wherever we wanted in the area.  I had asked the girls to prioritize what they each really wanted to see earlier in the week, and that determined our course.  First, we headed to the Washington Monument, as two girls wanted to see that up close, and one of them wanted to see the White House.  Lucky for us, we were able to see the White House, Capital Building and Licoln Memorial from the base, and that satisfied those requirements.  The Washington Monument up close is a site to behold...you really can't see the top standing at the bottom and looking straight up.  Did you know that there is a line approximately 150 feet up where work was stopped for quite a few years?  The marble they used when they began again was a slightly different shade.  On the South (I think) side of the monument is a gorgeous old tree.  It's several pieces coming out the ground, gnarly and perfect for climbing.  The girls enjoyed a little time on these tree before moving on to the American History Museum.

(I'll insert pictures here later these evening)

We were able to actually get into the First Ladies exhibit this time, and checked out the pictures from the inaugaration this year and the invention and play room. I also forced the girls to stop and look inside Julia Childs kitchen.  They've rebuilt her set there, and it was very interesting to see.

From there we headed next store to see the Natural History Museum.  We headed straight for the gem section, specifically the Hope Diamond.  With 3 girls, are you surprised?  We looked at a few other gems, then realized that it was too crowded in there to really enjoy the other displays, so headed off to find the gift store.  On the way, we came across the butterfly habitat.  For a fee, you can go in and walk among the butterflies. We didn't have the time and money that day to do so, but PB and I plan to return and go in.

After hitting the gift shop and the Hall of Mammals, it was time to head back to the bus.  All in all, it was a nice field trip.  Allowing each group to go where they wanted really made the trip nice, as we weren't constantly waiting for others to catch up.  It also allowed the kids to see those things that interested them most.  It seems like a fitting final trip for these 5th graders, about to head off to Junior High.

reading the cues

My children seem to be suffering from a recurrence of "it's almost the end of the school year and I must lose my mind"itis. I'm hoping they survive this flare up with my sense of humor intact.

It's amazing how different two children raised in the exact same household can be. My daughter can be a sensitive soul. She can work herself into a tizzy with very little outside stimulus. Figuring out how to cajole her out of these funks is tricky. It starts with trying to figure out what is causing her funk, and that is usually difficult to do. She's good at smokescreening you, avoiding the real issue.

She has small little moments of sadness several nights a week since her father left for deployment. After a couple of weeks of her working herself into a stomach ache and sobbing, I had to be tough. I now allow her 5 minutes of crying time. Then she has to suck it up and go to sleep. This was instituted after many other strategies were offered and failed. Diary time, talking, writing to daddy, dancing like a mad woman, visualization, nothing seemed to help her. And this solutions doesn't always work, but it has definitely helped. But this past week or so, I've noticed a diffferent type of sadness, and slowly it's been coming out (well, I've been piecing conversations together.) She is in 5th grade, and will be moving to the Junior High next year. This is a big change, but the change is minimized for her since the Junior High is attached to the elementary school. Same lunch room, same band room, same entrance. But slowly, she's learning that some of her friends won't be joining her in those rooms. One is switching to her home school, instead of school choicing. Another is moving to Texas. These are girls that she has literally known since Kindergarten or First grade, they've slept over at each other's houses dozens of times, shared birthday parties and simple growing up things. Going to a military school, she's used to people coming and going, and there are other kids in her class moving on as well. But it's a lot of changes all at once.

Luckily, I've been able to get her talking a little about the situation, and simply acting a fool with her from time to time seems to help the cloud pass over and sleep come. It's not always that easy, but for now I'll accept it.

Monster has also been having some minor melt down moments, although his occur just after pick up each evening. He's graduating from Kindergarten, and moving on to First grade. We go from half day of school, to eating lunch, having "specials", and homework. Luckily, he is super easy to cajole out of these funks most of the time. A good 5 minute session of tickling, kissing, wrestling and such generally gets him back into a good mood and ready to tackle whatever comes next.

As a mom, I'm happy that I'm able to find the keys to helping my children learn to cope with their feelings. I really feel that this year has brought us closer, and although I wouldn't have chosen it, I'm glad I can see the benefits from it.

What happened to Spring?

We often joke in the Mid-Atlantic that we don't relly have Spring...but we normally have at least a few nice days between the bitter cold and Africa Hot weather.  Apparently Mother Nature is going through the change and is having major hot flashes.  It was in the 40's/50's for the highs through last Thursday, and then in the 90's this weekend.  That is almost double the temperature.  It has been insane, but it's supposed to be a short lived 4 day streak, with thunderstorms and lower temps (woo hoo 60's) coming Wed.  So far I've refrained from turning on the AC, and this morning it was downright pleasant for sleeping, but tonight it's back to the oven.  Thank goodness we have a nice, cool basement we can hide in.  Play area, tv, craft area and table for the laptop.  We even ate dinner down there (leftovers heated in the microwave, then water ice cups...not the healthiest, but it's too hot to cook.)

This is a busy week here (they all are, but this is worse than usual.)  Tomorrow, PB has her Maypole parent's dress rehearsal night and Monster has Martial Arts.  Thank goodness for family.  Wednesday I have to meet Monster's Title One Teacher for Reading (about stinking time) and Thursday?  I think we might actually be free.  But Friday night we have another Maypole practice, and a cookie/cake decorating class, then Saturday is the festival with parade (which I believe both children will be walking in...which mean I'm walking as well and Maypole, I'm going out for my birthday with friends and the kids are getting individual time with the mother and mother-in-law (divide and conquer is the theme here.) Sunday is my birthday, and PB has to play bells at early service for church.  Then lunch/dinner with the whole fam.  Whew, I need a nap just thinking about all of that.

Is school out yet?  I'm ready for summer break.

sewing like a maniac

So, the plan for this evening was to come home, have some dinner, and do a little straightening.

Instead I spent it working on PB's Maypole costume.  Since they informed us tonight that we had to have costumes done by Friday morning for yearbook pics.  Good thing I was prepared and had it all cut out.  But it's going to be so cute...and she will look darling in it!

Thankful that it's (almost) completed

It's been a busy year here at Casa Lang.  I decided that I was going to spend more time in the real world and less in the virtual world, and I was going to get some projects done around the house.  And hoo boy, have I been going strong on that!

In January, I painted my powder room.  It's a lovely shade of green that makes me think "Ahhhh Spring" every time I walk in there.  I'm going to begin utilizing my husbands skill of hiding in the bathroom just to be soothed.  PB and I agreed that this green would be perfect for the bottom portion of her bedroom wall, so late in February we cleaned out her bedroom and went to work.  She also has the wood border that needed to be painted and stamped, so we took care of that as well.  Thank goodness for snow days...it took 4 days to paint, stamp, and clean/reorganize this room.  I was really tired of her room by the time we completed it.

You can see more pics in my Flickr Feed.

This past weekend, I tackled Monster's room.  It was time for him toget the big boy room, and it about killed me.  There was a Nascar wallpaper border at the top and the walls were gray.  That border took me 5 hours to remove...it was literally shredding as it peeled off.  Then the trim out took forever.  I finally finished it Monday night, and I love the colors and the new bookshelf and bench (and bedding) but I'm glad it's done for now.

Ignore the messiness....I took this right after he crawled out of bed today.  There's still more to go to finish his room.  Daddy is painting one (small) wall with camo, and the closet and main doors have to be painted.  We need to create the e center/desk on one wall.  And posters/pictures have to be found and hung.  But so far, I like it.  And he loves the colors on the wall.

So that's where I've been.  I'm tired, and this is a busy week.  But the smile and contented sigh he gave the first night he slept in there made it worthwhile.  Meanwhile, I'm done painting until at least May.  DDS is coming home in a couple of weeks for his mid tour 2 week leave, and I have some tidying to do before he gets home.

And a new Etsy store to start stocking...more on that to come!

Tired (GiST 14/365)

I'm tired. I'm so tired, we had pizza for dinner. So tired, that the remnants of dinner are still sitting there, waiting to be cleaned up. And tonight, the dishes aren't getting done. The trash will be thrown away, and leftovers have been put away, but my bed is calling, and I'm about to succumb to it's siren call.

I'm tired, and PB is tired, and that isn't a good combo. She didn't have a good night last night. She worked herself into a stomach/head ache again last night, and was up until 11 pm. I was trying to get to bed early, but obviously, that didn't happen. I admit, these spells try my patience. I know she misses her father, and I get it, I really do. But it frustrates me that she isn't using any of the techniques we've given her (and we've give her a ton of them.) I finally managed to get her calmed down enough to fall asleep, and then a bit later I finally got to go to bed. But then woke up an hour early to hear the wind threatening to take us away.

The office was hot as a jungle today, and I've been in a fog all day. By the time we were home tonight, all I wanted to do was crawl into bed and go to sleep. I managed to order dinner, make the cookies for Monster's school party tomorrow, and bathe the kids and put them to bed. In there, PB and I had a little tiff. I reminded her that just because she was tired, I wasn't going to tolerate her arguing, backtalking or yelling a me. I suggested she might just want to go to bed. After her shower, she came down and apologized to me for pitching a fit. That was a sign that she's starting to get it, and starting to really mature.

I've fought the tireds all day, and I worked hard to set aside the tireds during bed time. I hugged, kissed, tickled and wrestled them into bed, laughing all the way. That's a good way to end this Love Thursday...remembering the joy in that love.

1. Talking to my hubby on the phone, even if shortly, today.
2. Tickles and giggles with my kidlins.
3. A yummy breakfast potluck at work today.
4. Tomorrow is Friday.
5. Getting a great deal on webkinz for my kids, so they are getting two each for Valentine's Day.

GiST 7/365

1. Making one whole week of this exercise!
2. My son calling me out when I wasn't really listening to him.
3. The cleaning lady comes tomorrow...yay, clean bathrooms!
4. My Monster finally trying to learn his letters.
5. Bollywood dancing at our FRG meeting tonight. It was different and fun!

a mini-vacation

Today was my day off.  I slept in a little and took PB straight to school instead of to the youth center first, and then took Monster to Target to get new shoes.  Took him to the youth center, and then I had the day free.  I scheduled a massage for today, and it was heaven.  She hit the right spots, and at the end told me I had a lot of large knots that needed to be worked out.  I could tell.

Tomorrow it's bag to the grind of work again.  It's a busy week, and PB is going camping with girl scouts this weekend, so that makes it even busier.  But she loves camping with her group, and I enjoy my time with Monster alone.  I just have to make it to Friday now...lol.

Grace 2/365

1. Lunch out with a co-worker.
2. PB getting straight A's for another marking period.
3. Beginner Band Concerts - they have the opportunity to participate in a music program.
4. My Monster's not so good report card - he's stubborn about learning his letters, but the light bulb has gone off.
5. Video cameras, so that eventually my hubby will get to watch the band concert.

For an explanation of Grace in Small Things, go here.

Today, I feel like a bad mother

(Disclaimer...I know I am a good mother, and I'm not looking for validation here.  But I've let a few things lapse the last couple of weeks, and I need to come clean to relinquish my guilt...lol)

I just received an email from PB's band teacher.  She hasn't been to practice or full band since Christmas break, and they have a concert in two weeks...is she still interested, or is she giving it up?  Uhm, I'm pretty sure she's interested, but band is on Friday, and by Thursday night, we are a house just trying to survive until Friday night.  Plus, she isn't the most organized person, and she forgets things often.  Things like the lunch we just packed and I reminded her to pick up, and she says, "I know" and walks off without remembering to grab said lunchbox.  Yup.  So I think it's more a matter of "whoops, crap, I forgot" when she gets to school and it's too late to do anythign about it.

So I'll talk to her tonight, and see where she stands.  And somehow I'll program my Thursday night brain to remember that band is on Friday.  But with that email came a metric butt load of guilt.  Because I've been feeling a little like I'm phoning it in lately. 

Single parenting is hard.  This isn't a surprise to pretty much anyone, I'm sure, most especially not me.  But this time is harder for me in some ways.  I feel like I've lost my mind.  I can't remember things, can't get motivated to get things done.  I'm constantly back tracking, trying to catch the ball I dropped.  And it sucks! 

Only 8-9 more months. Hopefully, I don't kill a child or burn down the house before then.